Organisations that reward constant optimism and penalise negativity create environments where employees feel pressured to hide their struggles, notes Sonica Aron, founder of HR consultancy firm Marching Sheep.
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In today's fast-paced, always-on work culture, we have become familiar with terms like presenteeism (showing up to work while unwell) and burnout (chronic workplace stress). But there's a subtler, more insidious trend entering workplaces and social circles -- pleasanteeism.
Pleasanteeism is the pressure to appear constantly cheerful, agreeable and positive, even when struggling internally.
It's the forced smile in a meeting after a sleepless night, the 'I am fine!' when asked how you're doing or the reluctance to voice concerns for fear of being seen as a complainer.
Unlike presenteeism, which is about physical presence, pleasanteeism is about emotional performance -- masking true feelings to meet perceived expectations.
On the surface, maintaining a pleasant demeanour seems harmless and is considered professional. But when it becomes a constant act, the emotional stress takes a toll.
Research shows that suppressing negative emotions for a prolonged period of time can lead to increased stress, anxiety and even physical health issues.
A study by the American Psychological Association found that employees who consistently hide their stress or dissatisfaction at work are more likely to experience burnout and disengagement.
The fact is that the more we pretend, the harder it becomes to remain authentic. And when authenticity is stifled, mental health suffers.
Pleasanteeism stems from deep-seated cultural and workplace norms; some of them are listed below:
Fear of judgment
Many worry that showing vulnerability will make them appear weak or incompetent. In competitive environments, admitting feeling stressed or overwhelmed can feel like admitting failure.
Social conditioning
From childhood, we're taught to be polite, stay positive and not make a fuss. These lessons, while well-intentioned, often translate into emotional suppression.
Workplace culture
Organisations that reward constant optimism and penalise negativity create environments where employees feel pressured to hide their struggles.
A Harvard Business Review study found that 58 per cent of employees feel they can't discuss mental health at work without repercussions.
But it's important to understand that pleasanteeism isn't inevitable. By recognising it and taking intentional steps, we can foster healthier workplaces and personal lives.
Practise authenticity
Breaking free from pleasanteeism starts with small but meaningful steps towards authenticity.
Instead of defaulting to 'I'm fine,' try calibrated responses that reflect your true state without oversharing.
Over time, these honest exchanges help normalise authentic communication in your workplace culture. For example, stating candidly, 'I am tired and looking forward to the weekend' or 'I have had a long day and this is my last meeting' or 'I am dreading today, I have back-to-back meetings till evening.'
These statements make one come across as human, break down defences and create a more informal and comfortable work environment.
Set boundaries
Recognise that emotional bandwidth is a finite resource that needs conscious management.
Identify situations where performative positivity drains you the most -- perhaps in client meetings or team stand-ups -- and allocate your energy accordingly.
Lead with vulnerability
Modelling appropriate vulnerability can transform your team's dynamic. When you make a mistake, try sharing it constructively.
You can say 'I want to be transparent that I missed this deadline because I underestimated the research phase. Here's how I'm adjusting my approach.'
This demonstrates that professionalism includes accountability, not perfection.
Redefine professionalism
Challenge outdated notions that equate professionalism with emotional suppression.
Suggest practical alternatives like dedicating the first five minutes of brainstorming sessions to naming obstacles before ideating; take the emotional pulse of the room before starting the meeting.
Create micro-resistance moments
Develop subtle ways to push back against the pleasanteeism culture.
Keep go-to phrases handy for when you encounter forced positivity, such as: 'I appreciate the optimism but right now I need to work through this challenge.'
These small acts create breathing room within existing systems while you work towards larger cultural change.
Seek (and offer) support
Me-time, therapy, employee assistance programmes and peer support groups can provide safe spaces to express emotions without judgment.
If you notice a colleague always brushing off stress, a simple 'You don’t always have to be okay with me', 'I can be a good listener' can open the doors to a real connection.
Many organisations are now recognising the dangers of pleasanteeism and are taking steps to foster more open, mentally and emotionally healthy workplaces.
How companies are training for psychological safety
Companies are building capability in people managers to recognise emotional distress through micro-expressions and behavioural changes. They're replacing scripted check-ins with authentic conversations like 'What's weighing on you this week?'
For example, Microsoft trains leaders to respond with 'Tell me more' instead of quick fixes.
1. Tangible mental health support
Forward-thinking firms now offer 'mental health first aid' courses alongside traditional benefits.
EY reports a 34 per cent productivity boost in teams using their ‘ru ok?’ chatbot for anonymous support. Some companies even track psychological safety scores in engagement surveys.
2. Improving feedback systems
Few organisations have monthly 'vent sessions' where employees can voice frustrations without naming anyone.
Tech start-ups are implementing 'stress metrics' in performance dashboards alongside KPIs to normalise emotional transparency as a business metric.
3. Redefining workplace norms
Progressive HR policies now classify emotional labour as real work and openly include 'authenticity hours' in work schedules.
4. Community-driven support networks
Beyond traditional employee resource groups, companies also host 'imperfect sharing circles' where executives model vulnerability.
New platforms like Bravely connect employees with peer mentors who've overcome similar struggles, creating organic support webs.
While change is slow, these efforts are creating spaces where employees feel safe to be human and authentic, not just professional actors.
Pleasanteeism thrives in environments where discomfort is avoided at all costs. But growth, both personal and professional, happens in the messy, honest moments.
When we allow ourselves and others to be human, we create workplaces and relationships that are not just productive but sustainable as well.
The next time someone asks 'How are you?,' pause before you respond.
You don't have to spill your deepest struggles but you also don't have to lie.
A little authenticity can be the first step in breaking a cycle that's harming far too many.
Pretending to be okay when you're not doesn't make you stronger; it just makes you tired.
Real strength comes from being honest about how you feel, even if it's just admitting, 'Today was hard.'
When we stop equating professionalism with perfection, we create workplaces where people can thrive as humans and not just perform as robots.
Change starts small. With one real conversation, with one less 'I'm fine,' we take one step toward building a culture where mental health matters more than appearances.
After all, a workplace that lets you be you isn't just nicer; it's healthier for everyone.
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