'I'm 48. My Kids Don't Want Me to Remarry'

rediffGURU Ravi Mittal, CEO, Quack Quack, suggests how to choose between your happiness and your children.

Falling in love after a divorce or separation is not easy.

If you've been lucky enough to find someone who makes you happy again, it can be heartbreaking when your parents or children don't approve.

rediffGURU Ravi Mittal, CEO, Quack Quack, an online dating website suggests how to choose between your own happiness and your children.

• You can post your relationship-related questions to rediffGURU Ravi Mittal HERE.

Anonymous: I am a 48-year-old man, divorced three years ago after 22 years of marriage.
My ex-wife got custody of the children and I pay maintenance.
Now I have met a wonderful lady, aged 41, who is also divorced.
We both want to marry, but my children, aged 20 and 17, are completely against it.
They say that if I marry, I will lose them forever.
Should I choose my happiness or my children?

I am so sorry that you are in such a tricky situation.

This is a very sensitive matter and must be handled carefully.

While I can't tell you what to choose, I can tell you that any decision that hurts your children will not give you peace.

The best approach is to take baby steps.

They are against this marriage so, for now, stop pitching that to them.

Have a conversation and ask them what it is that they are against. It is important to hear them out; their emotions are valid.

It will also help them understand that their opinions matter to you.

Next, request them to meet your partner.

Tell them if they do not like her at all, you will reconsider the whole thing.

Again, they will see that their happiness is important for you. See where things go from there.

• You can post your relationship-related questions to rediffGURU Ravi Mittal HERE.

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