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Rediff.com  » Getahead » How Do I Handle My Wife's Infidelity?

How Do I Handle My Wife's Infidelity?

By rediffGURU RAVI MITTAL
Last updated on: January 05, 2024 19:31 IST
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Acknowledging the infidelity is a positive step.
Have an honest conversation about the issue and work together to move forward, advises rediffGURU Ravi Mittal.

How to overcome my wife's infidelity

Illustration: Dominic Xavier/Rediff.com

Is your partner unfaithful?

Have you recently discovered something about your spouse that you want to confront him/her with?

Are you in love with someone who you think doesn't love you in the same way?

rediffGURU Ravi Mittal is the CEO and founder of QuackQuack, an online dating platform.

He is an expert on dating and relationships.


Saurav: We are married for 10 years.
My wife had sexual relationship with another person.
How to overcome this infidelity?

Dear Saurav, I understand that facing infidelity in a relationship is incredibly tough and I'm sorry you're going through this.

To make it through this challenging time, open communication and commitment from both partners is crucial.

Starting with acknowledging the infidelity is a positive step. Have an honest conversation about the issue and work together to move forward.

Let's face it, it happened. I assume you decided to keep working on your marriage so you will have to take it one step at a time.

Acceptance is the first step.

While friends and family can provide support, consider seeking couples therapy to address underlying problems.

Guidance from a professional is invaluable in rebuilding trust and understanding. They can offer you a more structured approach.

And don't forget to take care of yourself. You might even consider seeking individual counselling to sort out the emotional turmoil caused by this.

Rebuilding trust takes time and both parties need to be dedicated. Manage your expectations and remember that recovery is a gradual process.

Best Wishes!

  • You can ask rediffGURU Ravi Mittal your dating and relationship-related questions HERE.

Anonymous: Hello I am married 42 male. I m in love with a lady who is also married for the last two years.
We met through matrimony prior both of our marriage in 2015.
She has many relationships till date with colleagues and also with her husband's boss.
In spite of knowing this, I am unable to come out of the relationship. Also she used to tell me she doesn't love me.
I have already spent around Rs 1.5 lakhs for buying gifts.

Dear Anonymous, you are indulging in a very toxic relationship and my only advice is to get out of it as quickly as possible.

First off, it's unethical. You are married and that makes it cheating.

Secondly, the woman is clearly not in love with you and she has been vocal about it.

You are wasting your time, energy and money on someone who does not care for you. I am sorry that you have to go through this, but it's the truth.

Best Wishes!

 

Anonymous: I got married an year back, an arranged marriage and life was okay till now.
I accidentally saw my wife's phone and realised that she had an affair before marriage including physical relationship.
When I confronted her, she accepted that it is true and that they have parted ways later.
I am unable to accept the fact and have been living in separate rooms now.
Please advise as to what to do now as I feel cheated and unable to accept her...

Dear Anonymous, I am guessing your wife's past relationship ended before you two got married.

If so, you have no reason to be upset. It's all in the past and everyone has one.

Be it a physical relationship or an emotional one, if it was before you came into her life, it should not matter one bit.

It is not even remotely close to cheating. Focus on your marriage.

The best way to do so is to sit with her and have an open discussion. Don't push her for details because it would neither be comfortable for her to speak of it with her husband nor will you like hearing it.

In short, it won't do your marriage any good. And it's not at all important in the current scenario.

You cannot demand that someone disclose everything that happened before you came into their lives. It's up to them to reveal it in their own time and at their convenience.

What's in the past should be there. Don't drag it to the present and ruin your lives. And don't forget that you love your partner and kindness does not cost a dime.

Best Wishes!

  • You can ask rediffGURU Ravi Mittal your dating and relationship-related questions HERE

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