Lasting longer in bed does not spice up things.
Spending quality time together, being comfortable with each other, communicating your needs, and asking about your partner's needs and expectations will help improve the quality of your relationship, suggests Sybil Shiddell.
Can marriage make your sex life bland?
Yes. Long-term relationships tend to get boring after a certain period of time and it is pretty obvious to hit some roadblocks in your marriage.
Do you find yourself stuck in your physical relationship?
Is there a slump in your sex life?
Are you bored with the sex life with your partner?
According to Sybil Shiddell -- country manager for Gleeden India, a discreet extra marital dating Web site -- it takes a lot from both the individuals in a marriage to keep the fire of love ignited.
One needs to take that extra effort or do things that help in breaking the monotony, from time to time.
Problems start creeping in when the relationship lacks attention and efforts possibly even leading to infidelity.
The distinction between how individuals view marriage as a routine or habit and less as a partnership depends on gaps in time as well.
Here are some reasons why marital sex gets boring and what you can do about it.
1. Speak their love language
We usually love our partners the way we want ourselves to be loved.
Instead, learning your spouse/partner's love language can help make your relationship healthy.
Knowing your partner's needs will remove the bubble of distance in your relationship and increase intimacy.
2. Quality over quantity
Sex is essential in a marriage. Even counselors would agree to this.
However, it's not about how many nights and times you are involved with them, it's the affection between you and your partner that really matters.
Lasting longer in bed does not spice up things.
Spending quality time together, being comfortable with each other, communicating your needs, and asking about your partner's needs and expectations will help you build and improve the quality of your relationship.
3. Comfort and confidence
Not many people are confident about the way they look.
For intimacy, getting comfortable in your own skin is very important.
Seeing and accepting yourself as an attractive person will enhance your confidence and improve your sexual relations with your partner.
4. Communication
It is very important to have communication in a relationship.
Talking about your needs in bed to your partner will create a better understanding and guide you to make the required changes in your behaviour and approach.
At the same time, giving empty promises can ruin your partner’s interest and trust.
It's best to be honest with your partner, so they can bond with you better and the flame of love between you shines forever.
5. Make an effort
Many people stop doing things that they used to do earlier to impress their partner. This leads them to question their worth and gradually one of them starts losing interest.
Going on small dates, taking trips, going dancing, cooking a meal are just some things that can work like a blow torch in your relationship.
After all, sex is a way how you express your love.
6. Add a new passion
Experts believe that doing something new gives our brain a kick of dopamine which is the same thing that creates romantic passion.
Pick a list of things the two of you can do together -- cooking, gardening, salsa, trekking.
The adventure of trying a new activity or passion will help you see your partner with a fresh perspective and also ignite the brain to feel attracted to the person.
7. Cuddle and kiss
Following the daily patterns of cuddling, kissing, and hugs are like practically pulling the distance apart and making the emotional bond stronger.
Giving each other massages is another way of connecting with your partner.
8. Pen down your thoughts
Writing down the thoughts in your mind is the most helpful way to get rid of issues revolving around them.
Putting down your unstructured thoughts or even fantasies also helps you and your partner understand your requirements and builds transparency.
There are some things you cannot explain or discuss but writing them down and sharing it with your spouse will help your partner understand what arouses and interests you.
9. Pelvic exercises
Putting your pelvic muscles to work can help you enjoy your intimate time better as it releases the tension in your muscles.
Doing kegel exercises and contraction techniques can help couples who are unsatisfied with their sexual relationships.
10. Practice foreplay
Often ignored or downplayed, foreplay is an exquisite aspect of a relationship making the whole experience linger a little longer.
It can make intercourse more pleasurable for couples.
Foreplay before sex is an invaluable tool that will help couples in breaking the monotony in their bedroom.
It will add a new freshness to your long-term relationship and married life.
