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7 tips to deal with a FLIRTY boyfriend

By SYBIL SHIDDELL
June 03, 2021 14:04 IST
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The golden rule is, not to accuse him, says Sybil Shiddell, country manager, Gleeden, an extra marital dating Web site.
Ask him the reason and make sure you make him comfortable to open up with you.

Is your boyfriend flirting too much?

Kindly note the image has been posted only for representational purposes. Photograph: Kind courtesy Katerina Holmes/Pexels.com

If you are feeling insecure because your boyfriend is flirting too much, it's a significant loss of trust.

It is disheartening and can be sometimes irritating.

In this kind of scenario, you might feel like a fool but you just need to give this bitter experience a little time. And maybe when you give this a thought and time to understand his real intentions, things would fall in place.

You would need a lot more patience to deal with this.

Don't let your hopes shatter when you see him flirting with some other girl in your presence. Stay calm and stay there.

A cheeky boyfriend does not necessarily cheat on you.

Save yourself from getting into the hot flow of anger and insecurities as thinking calmly and handling things maturely would prevent you from walking towards the ‘exit door’ of your relationship.

Handling this kind of situation wisely will eventually pave the way for peace and happiness in your relationship.

Stay with two of your best buddies during tough times like these -- patience, and some good advice.

If you no longer feel enthusiastic about the guy you loved, and your eyes no more twinkle with happiness and excitement then we won't blame you, we swear.

You are not the only one feeling this way in this kind of situation. After all, having your partner make advances on another woman is not a pleasant experience and can hit really hard.

However, being flirty doesn't always mean that your partner feels any physical attraction for others, or has sexual interest towards them.

Sometimes it's just harmless fun that they feel like indulging in.

Here are some handy tips on how to deal with a flirty boyfriend and make it work for both of you.

These suggestions are based on feedback received from 10,000 Gleeden users (female) from across India.

1. Do not rush!

Different people flirt for different reasons.

So, before assuming that he is a cheater and has bad intentions for you, make sure that you don't rush and end up taking a harsh decision.

The reasons might surprise you.

Some men flirt simply to boost their confidence, some prefer doing it just for fun, and few might do this because they are naturally flirty by personality and do so without having an actual interest in the person.

Try and see if he flirts only with hot girls, or if he just simply gets on very well with anyone he meets and speaks with. Keep calm and observe!

Based on their real life experiences, as many 46.25% females (who shared their feedback on Gleeden) said that being patient to judge a man’s character is the best way to go forward.

Impulsive behaviour could lead to verbal engagements that can hamper the relationship.

2. Be calm and self-composed

The very first thing you should do after knowing his intention is to stay poised.

The naturally flirtatious one won't harm you, but irritate. Now is the time to make him realise his habit and find a middle path.

We know it's tough to remain graceful but that's the only wise thing to do here. Find the right time, cool your nerves, and have a little casual chat, not too serious!

Self-control is the best foot forward and 51.12% users have suggested the same.

Staying calm will not only send a strong message to the other half but one would never be dependent on anyone else for their happiness.

3. Mind your tone

In the heat of the moment, you might miss out on minding your tone while talking about a few over-sensitive matters.

If you talk to him in an accusing and offending tone, you would never achieve what you want.

By raising your voice, he would simply get defensive and the spark between you two will start vanishing.

If you wish to get things done, talk but don’t fall prey to an unnecessary argument. It will lead you nowhere.

Ensure that you control your anger before you start any communication.

Words once uttered can't be taken back and 41.42% females agree that in the case of an argument, words should be chosen wisely. A milder tone always helps.

4. Don't act naive

Trust is the backbone of any relationship, but too much trust is also not good.

Find the right balance between trust and awareness.

You must ensure to be trustworthy but yet conscious of what is really going on in his life.

The right attitude towards your love life and partner will ensure a happy and joyful relationship.

Approximately 40% female users feel it's important keep both eyes open in a relationship. One should always be aware of the status of the relationship and how the other person is behaving to be able to spot the red flags.

5. Trust is essential

It is! Things won't take a U-turn all of a sudden and change dramatically.

Do not put much pressure on him; give him sufficient time to show you his efforts, and try to focus on the positivity that he is pouring in for the betterment of the relationship.

Give him a sign of your trust, and he will feel happy and will further make efforts to make you feel relieved.

6. Communication is key

Communicating in the right manner plays a very important role in taking care of your relationship.

Do not show the ugly side of your relationship by indulging in unnecessary arguments when in public and instead, find a moment to talk when it’s just the two of you.

Create a dialogue and express what you have noticed so far and how it feels to be in your position.

The golden rule is, not to accuse him. Ask him the reason behind it and make sure you make him comfortable to open up with you.

Try to end the conversation on a good note where you don't end up hurting him and request him to control his behaviour for the sake of your relationship.

The possibility is that you may still find it tough to reach a common point even after all the advice.

Moreover, you simply can't change someone's personality completely and you shouldnt even try.

If you still feel uncomfortable and jealous despite his efforts, it's necessary that you spend time with yourself and think about whether you wish to stay or move on.

Because getting upset every time he talks to his female friends or colleagues will be a waste of time and relationships will soon die a natural death without trust.

Maintaining a healthy and successful relationship is as important as making healthy compromises in a relationship.

If you are keeping quiet and compromising on major and sensitive matters for the sake of peace in a relationship, it won't last long and the chances of your bond striving in the long haul will be slim.

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