Religious differences have never been a barrier among Bollywod's famous couples, says Bharathi Pradhan. In this excerpt from her book, Colas, Cars & Communal Harmony, she looks at the marriage between the highly popular Hrithik Roshan and the beautiful Suzanne Khan:
When Hrithik Roshan fell in love, it was quite literally a traffic-stopping moment for him. He'd glimpsed Suzanne Khan at a traffic light and his heart had lurched, much like Raj, his character did in his debut movie Kaho Naa Pyaar Hai when he first saw the pensive heroine.
The Juhu dudes soon knew that Hrithik and Suzanne were an item. But it took a few more months for the moonstruck young man to tell his mom, Pinky Roshan, just how honourable his intentions were.
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But before that, Hrithik wasn't exactly squirming or tossing around in bed, wondering how to break it to his parents.
Looking well-scrubbed and alert, Hrithik distinctly remembers. "I'd been brought up to believe that the best religion is humanity. It's something my mother used to say to me. I believe children learn by watching their parents. I have seen my parents give so much respect to people from different religions that I instinctively knew that Suzanne's religion wouldn't matter to them.
"For instance, we didn't personally celebrate Idd but it was an occasion when people would come over, biryani would be sent across and my father would wish all his friends. I knew how to greet someone on Idd.
"So it never even occurred to me that I might have a problem with my parents about marrying a Muslim girl. It was on my mind that if there was a problem, I'd repeat to them what they had taught me. That would've been the time to put to test what they'd instilled in me. But just as I expected, my father and mother didn't raise even the minutest objection to our marriage."
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"So there was no problem ever with my parents. I think it's ridiculous to the point of being preposterous to judge people by their religion. Whatever her creed, she'd still be the same person."
Long before that short interlude in the bedroom, like all mothers, Pinky had already guessed in which direction Hrithik's heart had strayed. So when the Roshans heard about Hrithik and Suzanne, it didn't stump them.
On the contrary, father Rakesh Roshan recalls, "We only told Hrithik to make sure he doesn't hurt her. Since Sanjay and Zarine are family friends, we didn't want to be embarrassed in any way, so we told Hrithik to make sure he stands by his commitment. Which he did."
Happily, the Hindu-Muslim card didn't get played by either the Khan clan or the Roshan parivar.
Long before Kaho Naa Pyaar Hai brought the bounty to his doorstep, even Hrithik's grandfather J Om Prakash (who is duly respected as the seniormost in the family) had enthusiastically pronounced Suzanne as part of the khandaan. J Om Prakash first learnt about Hrithik and Suzanne at a party on the Roshan terrace where he met Sanjay Khan's daughter. He was so delighted that he spoke to her dad and announced to all the guests gathered there that Hrithik and Suzanne were officially betrothed.
Any mention of conversion didn't arise simply because neither the couple nor the Khan-Roshan families even gave it a thought. It was an undiscussed, foregone decision that they'd opt for a civil wedding and get on with their lives without displacing the Gods they grew up with.
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The bride's father Sanjay Khan's sprawling new luxury spa Golden Palms in Bangalore provided the perfect venue for the family event and the traditionally renowned Khan family hospitality ensured impeccable arrangements.
"We did our own thing," Hrithik describes his wedding like an enthusiastic bridegroom. "We had neither a Hindu ceremony nor a nikaah. Actually, both of us had always wanted a church wedding. I've always been inspired by them, I've seen them in films! Church weddings look so lovely, so short and sweet. We had something very close to that in Bangalore. The pool in Golden Palms is the biggest in Asia and right in its centre is something like an island. There's a bridge extending from there to the edge of the pool. The bridge acted like an aisle for us. We walked down the entire stretch, went to the centre of the pool, stood there, took our vows and signed the register. It was even better than a church wedding. It was so special, so different!"
The best things in life are understated. Without making loud noises, the Khans and the Roshans unfussily brought together the two communities. Rakesh has never been traditionally religious while Sanjay too has also never lingered on the communal.
"On the contrary," observes Rakesh pertinently remarks, "when the couple exchanged rings, J Omji recited the Gayatri mantra and Sanjay also chanted the mantra along with him. In fact he could say it better than us."
"The film industry is secular," observes Rakesh Roshan. "I wonder if it has struck anyone that I made a film called Karan Arjun with two Khans in the title roles!"
Despite the communally polarised viewpoints about the underworld diktats to Hrithik, Rakesh Roshan steadfastly refuses to buy the Hindu boy versus the Khan guys theory. There was the uneasy rumour that Rakesh Roshan had been shot at in January 2000 because the underworld had been upset that the Roshan boy had upset the box office stakes of the ruling Khan trio. "If that were true, then Hrithik played a Muslim in both Fiza and Mission Kashmir and the Hindus should've been upset!" laughs Hrithik's father, sweeping the argument out of his horizon.
Coming back to the personal front, Rakesh was always clear that Hrithik and Suzanne would have the freedom to work out their merger without intrusion.
And Hrithik believes there's no question of trying to change Suzanne in any way. The Roshans have always had havans on special occasions "which Suzanne enjoys as much as any of us or even more," Hrithik reports. "In fact she was after my life to visit Vaishnodevi after marriage. She was dying to go there and we got the opportunity only this July. We both walked up all the way and walked down again. We didn't sit on the horse at all. That was quite a feat and it was so much fun!"
"Of course Suzanne continues to be whatever she has always been," echoes Rakesh to whom conversion wasn't an option. "When it didn't occur even to my father-in-law and he accepted it so instantly, why would such things strike any of us?" questions Rakesh. "I don't know much about what she practises. But I've seen her light a diya in the morning. And I know she observes karva chauth!"
In keeping with his belief that Hrithik and Suzanne should be left alone to lead their lives as they'd like to, Rakesh Roshan had once cracked. "Ideally, they can run the house and manage everything, while we'd be like paying guests!"
As it turns out, that's not quite the arrangements the Roshans have ultimately designed for themselves. The family has two large floors coming up in a new building and it'll be to each (a floor of) his own!
Excerpted from Colas, Cars And Communal Harmony by Bharathi S Pradhan, Rs 195, India Book Distributors, with the author's permission.
