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Scrooging, Benching...Worst Dating Trends

By RAVI MITTAL
September 30, 2022 09:24 IST
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Two in five women tend to fall for the same type of man every time, inviting unwarranted dating failures.
Stop groundhogging! exclaims Ravi Mittal, CEO, Quack Quack, an Indian dating app.

Worst dating trends

Kindly note the image -- a scene from the web series Indian Matchmaking 2 that streams on Netflix -- has been posted only for representational purposes.

With the world shifting towards online dating, there seems to be a new dating trend emerging every other day.

You might have heard of catfishing and ghosting, but have you heard about the newcomers -- kitten fishing, and soft ghosting -- yet?

Just when you believed you've figured it all, the dating world will surprise you.

Hold your breath, or don't, while we enlighten you about some of the latest dating trends.

#1. Vulturing

Well, what do you think vultures do? Hover around dying animals, looking for scraps?

But who knew vultures were not the only creatures to circle the dying? Humans do it too!

Some people hover around dying relationships.

Once the break-up is confirmed, the vulture swoops in to comfort their prey, hoping to eat, no, date them. In fact, the desperation of this act will put real vultures to shame.

#2. Dry-dating

Among the hot-new trends of 2022 is dry dating -- being sober on dates and not looking for answers at the bottom of a bottle.

This trend emphasises the importance of meaningful and engaging conversations on a date and puts a much-needed end to drunken disasters.

As many as 36 per cent of young Indian daters mentioned that dry dating brings light to harmful dating behaviour. Most of these people have stopped relying on liquor for a smooth date.

#3. Cushioning

Let's look at it this way, what's the role of a cushion in your life?

It lets you sit comfortably, with some added support.

Who doesn't love cushions? But to have a cushion in dating is when you have one person you are dating and several others on the side.

Maybe you are unsure of the relationship, or past breakups have left you more guarded, and you can't give in a 100%.

It is not all bad.

People often lean towards cushioning at the beginning of a relationship when it is not yet exclusive.

It's more like tying loose ends. But once you have defined the relationship and are committed, cushioning inches a lot towards being unfaithful.

#4. Benching

You have heard of players getting benched in football games.

Daters get benched just as well.

It is when you keep someone on the sideline owing to several factors.

Maybe you are not ready to be in an exclusive relationship yet or don't have strong enough feelings for them to define the relationship, but enough to not let go.

The worst is benching someone because you feel lonely but not so lonely that you would want to commit to them.

The act is toxic and rude. If you happen to be on the receiving end of this trend, please move on. And if you are the one doing it, it's time for introspection.

#5. Breadcrumbing

This one's a no-brainer.

Are you leading someone on?

You are breadcrumbing! For instance, you have moderate feelings for someone but certainly not enough to be with them.

You leave crumbs like dropping messages and calling them at times, just enough to make them follow you even when you don't want to follow through.

To be more precise, breadcrumbing is when you send flirty hints with no intentions of moving forwards in a relationship. It is misleading!

#6. Haunting

First came ghosting, and now there's haunting.

It makes sense because some people can be more terrifying than a horror movie.

Haunting is when you keep a tab on your ex's social media presence. You haunt them, literally!

Maybe you are not in touch, nor intend to get in touch, but love knowing what's new in their life.

You watch their stories and posts and even comb through the comment section.

It's an absolute breach of privacy, not that anyone has any in this social media-dictated world.

If your ex is haunting you, since exorcism is not an option, block them.

#7. Scrooging

It's an awful trend when you dump someone right before festivities and public celebrations like Christmas, New Year's eve, Valentine's Day, or other holidays.

Just wait for the reason; it makes it even worse.

It's because Scrooge does not want to spend money on buying you gifts for the holidays.

A scrooge thinks: 'Why should I spend a fortune on buying someone a Valentine's Day gift if I intend on breaking up with them anyways?'

You'd hate to think how common that is. Two in ten men between the ages 20 and 25 are guilty of scrooging.

#8. Groundhogging

This trend explains the act of dating the same type of people over and over again, but hoping for different outcomes.

Most people have a "type" when it comes to dating.

Two in five women tend to fall for the same type of man every time, inviting unwarranted dating failures.

Stop groundhogging; expand your dating preferences.

You might finally meet your one true love.

#9. Situationship

A situationship is a situation when it's not just friendship, but it's not an exclusive relationship either. It's somewhere in between these two.

It is that stage when a romantic relationship is yet to be defined by the couple. The onlookers have, but the duo is yet to figure it out.

"We are not 'just friends,' but we are not 'together' either."

We've all heard this annoying statement. Spare us the cringe and call it a situationship.

#10. Zombie-ing

Ghosts have taken a backseat while the zombies are ruling the dating world.

Zombie-ing is as literal as it sounds -- a person who ghosted you decided to re-emerge in your life.

But unlike zombies, these people pretend as if nothing has happened.

Zombie-ing can start with a seemingly harmless 'hey' text or a 'long time no see' phone call.

Like you would if you see a zombie, run when you see these ghouls. The dead should remain dead, whether it's people or a relationship.

I guess that's enough Internet for today.

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RAVI MITTAL