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Commentary/Mani Shankar Aiyar

Our quarrels we share
And we hold to our ground,
So we hunt with the hound
And we run with the hare!

Chorus :
United we are, divided we be
And eye to eye we just do not see.
We groan and we grunt
Yet we stay in the Front,
For awake or asleep
We are goats, we are sheep.
Our quarrels we share
And we hold to our ground,
So we hunt with the hound
And we run with the hare!

Home Minister:
They kick me around
And bind me with chains.
My reputation Is pock-marked with stains.
Not a principle left, I feel so bereft,
I call to my Marx:
"I'm surrounded by sharks!"

Defence Minister:
Who calls me a shark?
He's wide of the mark.
Bhandari's my man,
Not some just also ran.
So, I'll fight friend and foe
The home minister himself
For I'm not of their kind:
"Mao come, Mao go!"

Home Minister:
I am caged like a bird
No one's ever heard
A tale of such woe:
"Mao come, Mao go!"
There once was a day
When like a lion I roared
They'd all run away
When like a rhino I gored.
They'd shake in their seats,
They'd tremble in their sheets.
Now they hear me no more
And the PM? He snore.

Agriculture Minister:
How long, how long
Must I this misery suffer?
The weather in this craft
Gets rougher and rougher.
My kisan, my mazdoor
Has got nothing from his Budget.
Yet must I plead, "Hazoor,
Can you not fudge it?
One more paisa, Master.
Say it quick, say it faster,

Murasoli Maran:
I won't surrender to some old foreign agent
acclaimed for his feat in distant Wall Street
"You'll give to the soil
The fruits of whose toil
Are pumping up the rate of growth."
He curls his lip,
He sneers, he snarls,
And gives it all
To the rich whom I loathe.
I began as a Red
Now I'll take me to bed
For I am fed
Up,
And wish I were dead.

Home Minister:
I too am fed
Up
And wish I were dead!

Finance Minister:
What voices are these
That disturb
My hour of triumph?
I will not listen to those
Who go "Hmmm" and who harrumph.
I am the King
Of all I behold,
I am the Future
I am the Tale Untold.
The baggage of my past
I have left behind
And I have neither money
Nor mind
To waste on the kind
That live life in their hovels
When they should pick up their shovels
And build without fuss
Palaces and mansions
For People Like Us.

Defence Minister:
We are samajwadi, if you please,
We are
samajwadi, if you don't please.
And if you think your
angrezi
Will make us run
tezi
We'll invite you
To Farrukhabad
And there hit you hard
Till you learn to tell the difference
Between care and indifference
For the backwards of this land.

Finance Minister:
How dare you try to frighten me?
I've got friends in your camp too.
If you give me adhamki,
I'll tell you to shoo,
For closer to me than they are to you
Are Sanjay Dalmia and Amar Singh
Their hearts you may have
But you can't do a thing
For their pockets are mine
To empty -- or line!

Defence Minister:
(Expletives deleted)

Industry Minister:
All my life this man I've loathed.
Today I have both scraped and bowed
At the altar of our new tin-god
Whom we have taken as master,
Taken as lord.
But I am Maran, the same old Maran
And I will not surrender
To some old foreign
Agent of upper caste origin,
Who is acclaimed for his feat
In distant Wall Street.
But back in Sivaganga
Must hold my hand
Or sink without trace
And be washed up on the sand.

Finance Minister:
What I love about this job
The most
Is the opportunism
Of which we boast.
Nothing binds us, nothing ties,
On our plans there are no flies.
Together we'll stick
Through thin and thick,
Till the rug is pulled
From beneath our feet.
For that is no great threat to us
We'll roll into bed
With whomever we meet.

Chorus (the whole Cabinet together):
United we are, divided we be
And eye to eye we just do not see.
We groan and we grunt
Yet we stay in the Front,
For awake or asleep
We are goats, we are sheep.
Our quarrels we are sheep.
Our quarrels we share
And we hold to our ground,
So we hunt with the hound
And we run with the hare!

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Mani Shankar Aiyar
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