'As you gain experience, you realise that none of this is personal.'
'The failures actually teach you bigger and better lessons.'
Like thousands of aspirants in Mumbai, Palak Jaiswal had to wait for years before she got her first acting break since she moved from her hometown Bhopal.
She kept herself busy in theatre and commercials before landing her first major role in SonyLIV's well-received show Black, White & Gray - Love Kills, in which she plays a girl whose disappearance unearths a shocking murder mystery.
"Social media is your digital portfolio now. It is easier for the people to find out about you and connect. But ultimately, it's your talent that counts," Palak tell Mayur Sanap/Rediff.
Your character in Black, White And Gray is so twisted. What was your experience in playing such a role?
Since I have been in theatre, I can separate myself from the character I am playing.
Usually, the motive is to bridge the gap between the two. That's where you find your character.
For this particular character, I have to find out why she is making these choices. I had to find out the problems she is dealing with.
Were you comfortable with the bold scenes in this show?
There are not many bold scenes. And these scenes are not vulgar.
The scenes are justified.
To prepare for bold scenes, we had intimacy workshops so that both actors feel comfortable what they are doing. It should not feel like you are doing something you don't want to do.
And, of course, we were told about these scenes beforehand.
The director and creative team had explained how they are going shoot it. During the shoot, we had an intimacy coordinator.
She guided us; she gave us a safe word in case we didn't want to do anything. Overall, it was a very comfortable process both for me and my co-star Mayur (More).
What are your favourite crime thrillers?
I am a big fan of David Fincher movies.
I love Gone Girl. I love Amazing Amy as a character.
Somewhere, I was hoping to play a character like that. A character that's not your usual girl, who is slightly insane. Thankfully, my wish was fulfilled with Black, White And Gray.
In Hindi, I loved watching Gupt. It had a great blend of crime, suspense and thrill.
Where do you feel most fulfilled as an actor, in front of camera or live audience?
These are just mediums.
For me, acting in itself is a very fulfilling job.
What's more fulfilling is to find a character that challenges you. To find different aspects of your character is a very interesting process.
Camera is a very break and stop process. But in theatre, once you start there's no stop. It keeps on going.
Both are different mediums and very enjoyable.
Do you enjoy the process of auditioning?
It's daunting.
There's always some nervousness in you.
You don't get a complete script, so you enact on the basis of a little information about that particular character.
Sometimes, the brief that the casting agents give is different from the director's.
Many times you lose out on a role because of that.
Auditions are very luck-based.
How important is social media in a budding actor's journey?
Social media plays a very big part in terms of marketing yourself.
Actors don't go to production and casting people with portfolio in their hands anymore.
Social media is your digital portfolio now.
It is easier for the people to find out about you and connect.
But yes, ultimately it's your talent that counts. Social media only helps you in creating your existence.
Tell us about yourself.
I come from Bhopal.
My parents are extremely supportive, and have given me freedom of what I want to do.
My father brought me into theatre when I told him about my acting aspirations. He said if you want to learn acting, you should start with theatre.
I moved to Mumbai in 2008 and did my schooling here.
I was really good at dancing but didn't want to get into dancing professionally.
I shifted my focus to acting, then started giving auditions.
My professional acting began in 2019 when I started doing commercials.
Was it difficult to wait out your first break?
I always believed that patience and hard work will get me where I want to be.
The most important thing in this profession is perseverance and believing in yourself.
The bigger the dream the better it is because then you will work towards it.
The rest you have to leave up to the universe. Everything has its own timing.
How do you deal with rejections?
At first, I would be heartbroken.
The rejections used to shatter me. You take them personally.
But as you gain experience, you realise that none of this is personal.
The failures actually teach you bigger and better lessons.
Now I only focus on the positive part of things.