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March 29, 2000

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'It’s been a good year'

But box office success must be important as well…

Aishwarya Rai It’s a good feeling, no doubt, the so-called box office success. During Aa Ab…, the media had said stuff like, 'Why is Aishwarya so much in the background?' and ‘Suman takes the cake!’

When this happened, I thought it was Chintuji's (Rishi Kapoor) and my victory, because Pooja is meant to be in the background. She’s not supposed to grab Rohan’s (Akshaye Khanna) attention at all. Akshaye is supposed to look through her and find Suman so attractive. He was not supposed to look at her as the girl he could fall in love with.

If the audience felt that about me, it’s a success because that’s what the hero is supposed to think. That’s why I worked on keeping my mannerisms so plain. I kept my make-up slightly poor. That’s the way I work on my character. I don’t have to be Aishwarya Rai. My costumes were like really silly, simple, run down almost Plain Jane because that’s how I wanted it to be, of course with a slight confidence in the second half because she was a working girl.

Right from the time I heard the script of Hum Dil…, I knew people would atleast sit up and notice me as an actress, whether or not the film was a box office hit. Of course, I didn’t expect this amount of success. The appreciation feels very nice because this was what I was looking for. I wanted to be recognised as an actress, which is what this film did for me.

Taal's timing was great since it came soon after Hum Dil… It was like the icing on a cake. Being a Subhash Ghai film, it had a star aura to it. I guess that completes the picture. It’s been a good year and that feels really nice.

I'm really grateful to the audience because, like Miss World, my well wishers have been writing all along and they’ve always said, ‘We know.’ This latent confidence, this dormant anxiety, this encouragement was always there. What increases your personal pleasure is your audience’s pleasure. When people turn around and say they were praying and I justified their faith, it feels very great. When I went on my world tour after these two hits, the audience’s response was really nice.

You seem to be an introspective person.

I don’t know if I’m consciously doing that but, subconsciously, I guess yes. It just happens through life that, when you’re growing so fast and experiencing so much in so little time, you get closer in touch with yourself. That’s what makes life interesting.

My life does not circle around I-me-myself. I’m not egocentric or narcissistic or a megalomaniac. At the same time, I am introspective to a certain extent. Positively, so as far as I can help it. I don’t mean I’ll always admit to the nicer sides to me, but I mean a kind of looking into the mirror.

Does it make a difference in this industry if you don’t have a filmi background?

I have never felt completely alien. I don’t know if alien is the right word, but this was definitely a new world for me. Thankfully, I was welcomed here. I was beckoned here, I didn’t come searching. And I thank God for that and also the industry.

I don’t know if my story would be the broader perspective for the world at large, but for me, I’ve never felt out of place. For that matter, I’ve worked with most of the starsons as you may call them, but I’ve never felt any different. We used to tease and things like that, but I’ve never been treated differently. It’s just as new as any other world or office or college would be to you. It’s the way you look at it and the vibes you give out as far as you can help it.

I’m sorry if some people have had sad experiences. They might turn around and say that I’ve been lucky and they have not seen such a nice side to it, but that goes for most professionals and in many industries too. Some people might have had a great experience working with some company and some people might think completely otherwise. It’s probably good fortune and God’s blessings.

To some extent, it's the vibes you give out and how clear you make your objectives to people without making a hue and cry about it. I guess that’s where upbringing and conduct come in to an extent. The rest, I guess, is good fortune.

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