rediffGURU Dr Upneet Kaur, a therapist and marriage counsellor, explains how you can discuss money matters in a relationship.
Do your partner's spending habits annoy or worry you?
While women usually like to splurge on shopping and travel, men may buy gadgets, gaming and collectibles.
Even though these tendencies may annoy their partner, financial habits when not discussed openly can create tension in a relationship.
Here, rediffGURU Dr Upneet Kaur, a therapist and marriage counsellor from Amritsar, guides a young man how to discuss and set aside a budget for personal interests without affecting the family.
- You can post your marriage and relationship-related questions for rediffGURU Dr Upneet Kaur HERE
Anonymous: I am a 35-year-old office-going husband living in Pune and something confusing happened at home recently.
My wife scolded me strongly after noticing multiple online payments, assuming I was wasting money irresponsibly.
In reality, the spending was on anime subscriptions and collectibles, which I see as a harmless hobby and a way to relax after work but I never clearly explained this to her.
She feels the money should be saved for family needs while I feel misunderstood and judged for something I enjoy.
How can I talk calmly about money, personal interests and boundaries so that disagreements do not turn into blame and emotional distance?
Hobbies are a very important part of our life which help us remain connected with ourselves.
In the current digital world, we are all connected to social media.
Mobile phones have replaced hobbies in most of our lives.
I am really glad that you are following some of your hobbies.
Coming to your problem, you can talk to your wife and explain that an X amount of your income will be spent on your hobby/hobbies.
This way you will be able to create boundaries and she will also understand that you are not spending extra money on your interests.
In addition, explain to her that you are also saving money for the family which is equally important for you.
I hope this solves your problem.
- You can post your marriage and relationship-related questions for rediffGURU Dr Upneet Kaur HERE
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