'My Partner And I Have No Common Interests'

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'It's absolutely okay for two partners in a relationship to be widely different in their likes and dislikes,' says rediffGURU Anu Krishna. 'The key lies in how you bridge that gap.'

relationships: my partner and I have different interests

Illustration: Dominic Xavier/Rediff

Is it possible for two people with diverse interests to have a steady relationship?

Will the gap grow wider with time?

Is it important to have common interests for a long-term relationship?

"It's absolutely okay for two partners in a relationship to be widely different in their likes and dislikes," says rediffGURU Anu Krishna, mind coach and co-founder of Unfear Changemakers.

  • You can post your relationship-related questions for rediffGURU Anu Krishna HERE

Anonymous: My partner and I are very different when it comes to hobbies and interests.
For example, I enjoy going out, exploring new places, meeting people and trying new activities, while my partner prefers staying at home, watching movies or just relaxing quietly.
In the beginning, these differences didn't bother me much but now I sometimes feel like we don't have enough in common to spend quality time together.
There are moments when I want to do something exciting but I end up going alone or compromising; that makes me wonder if this gap will grow bigger over time.
At the same time, I also understand that everyone has their own personality and preferences. So I'm confused.
Is it actually okay for partners to have completely different hobbies and interests or is having common activities important for a strong and long-term relationship?

Yes, it's absolutely okay for two partners in a relationship to be widely different in their likes and dislikes.

The key lies in how you bridge that gap.

Is it by highlighting how different you are and feeling upset by it or by recognising those differences and finding things to do in common?

Usually, I would suggest having open communication where the two of you respectfully agree that you are different but will make the effort to spend time doing things together.

It's also okay to do your own things during the week and get together on the weekends to do stuff that both of you enjoy.

You could also agree that one weekend you spend time at home and do things that your partner likes and the next weekend the two of you do what you like by going out.

It's about bridging that gap respectfully and politely; it works!

  • You can post your relationship-related questions for rediffGURU Anu Krishna HERE

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