'It's hard to change the previous generation's mindset but you can draw boundaries to keep your sanity intact,' says rediffGURU Anu Krishna, mind coach and co-founder of Unfear Changemakers.
Living with in-laws after marriage can be a challenge.
Besides the generational gap and cultural differences, conflicts can arise when there is constant interference in a couple's personal life and daily decisions.
"Sadly, the previous generation assumes that the next generation needs their guidance," observes rediffGURU Anu Krishna, mind coach and co-founder, Unfear Changemakers.
In her advice to a distressed daughter-in-law, Anu recommends how she can deal with an interfering mother-in-law while protecting her own peace and marriage.
- You can post your relationship and marriage-related questions for rediffGURU Anu Krishna HERE
Anonymous: My mother-in-law gets involved in almost every aspect of my married life.
She has moved in with us and tells me how to manage our home and children.
The problem is that she has an opinion about everything I do.
When my husband is around, she acts innocent to get his love and attention.
She is a frequent liar and this has led to frequent arguments between us.
My husband is finding it difficult to balance his relationship with both of us.
How can I save my marriage?
What if you simply nod to whatever she says and then do exactly what you want?
Tell her: 'You may not like the way I do things at home so maybe it will be easy if you lead the way.'
Slowly ease your way out of some of the tasks in this manner by filling the same time with something else you can do.
Transition things to her so that she does them the way she wants to.
Sadly, the previous generation assumes that the next generation needs their guidance. Yes, they do. Not in the form of instructions, demands and impositions but with a lot of love, care and support.
It's hard to change their mindset but you can draw boundaries to keep your sanity intact.
- You can post your relationship and marriage-related questions for rediffGURU Anu Krishna HERE
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