I read quite a few comments and stories of experiences of people who offered monetary help or lent money to friends or relatives and could not get it back in time or felt let down by the people who they tried to help.

I believe this school of thought exists in our genes that when we help someone we expect them to repay it back within the time we expect them to or within a time frame or circumstances defined by us or defined by the person in trouble who is asking for the help.

First of all people who come across monetary problems in life are in such a desperate mode that they can promise anything or tell you a time limit even without thinking whether it would be logically possible to fulfill the promise he makes. All this to save their face in front of the society, family or the organisation that they work for and all these things mean he has some self respect left in him and sooner or later he would repay it unless and until you totally distrust him or he has an antisocial type.

Secondly, when you lend money to friends or to any one known or unknown be sure that you are giving away only an amount that you could afford to lose and which wouldn't put you into any sort of financial or mental stress or troubles.

Never keep a time limit that is not possible for the person asking for help and tell him that whenever he thinks his problems are over and when his situation is good he should return it. More than often this person would return your money no matter where you go and what you think of him over a period of time, be it months weeks or years.

When you help someone, believe me, god gets you help from some other quarters and not necessarily in the form of repayment from the people who you helped. So help someone with as much as you can without troubling yourself or your pocket and pray to god that when you are in trouble god would send the help you deserve rather than what you want.

I have had experiences where I have lent money to friends relatives and even to new people I met or colleagues. Some times I have got it in time some times I didn't.

But no complaints because whenever I was in trouble I always found help in some other form from people, friends and sources I never expected. Its just about being helpful to someone who needs you at a time when he feels no one else would be able to help in this world.

Life is a mixture of good and bad experiences and I don't intend to sermonise but good deeds beget good results and bad deeds begets bad results.

Disclaimer: This is a reader-driven feature. The views expressed by the readers are their own, and not that of Rediff.com. Rediff.com has not altered the material presented here and does not endorse it in any way.

Have you even found yourself in such a situation? Has a relative/ friend who borrowed money from you defaulted on repayment? How did you handle things?

We would love to hear from you -- email your experiences, advice and opinions in this regard to getahead@rediff.co.in, and the best entries will be published right here on rediff.com.