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'Not a team, just a bunch of individuals'

Faisal Shariff

So what is Sadagoppan Ramesh doing in Bangalore when he still hasn't recovered from his thumb injury? Did Messrs Borde and Co. bother to find out whether is was fit or not?

There was such a hue and cry about Ajay Jadeja's fitness. He was sent to South Africa for consultation, but yet after the doctor there gave him the thumbs up, BCCI honorary secretary Jaywant Lele sent the flamboyant cricketer to an Indian doctor who ruled otherwise.

It was only after Ramesh came to Bangalore and faced Javagal Srinath and Ajit Agarkar did he think he had recovered. Kapilpaaji felt that he is pushing himself too hard and that it would be better to sit out of the game.

This is not the first instance that the BCCI has messed things up. They made the same mistake by announcing Ramesh's name for the Board President's team to take on the touring South Africans without even seeking a fitness certificate from him.

Can we have some answers please?

While on Ramesh, here's a joke that's doing the rounds.

Someone asked Nayan Mongia if will be in the one-day squad to play the Proteas. The wicketkeeper replied: "I am keeping my fingers crossed." To which Ramesh, who was sitting just next to him, pointed to his plastered thumb and remarked: "He is lucky. At least he can keep his fingers crossed. I can't even do that."

The recent news about a former Indian cricket captain disclosing 16 crores under the VDIS scheme has stirred the entire betting controversy all over again. While talking to one of the players, I asked him about the issue.

"At the rate that we are losing I think it's time we paid somebody to lose the game," he said.

Reminiscent of the time when Scotland Yard probed some English players about match-fixing. Mark Butcher, standing in as captain then, remarked: "Which sane person would pay England players to lose. They are losing anyway."

So, is Hansie Cronje going to quit as South African captain?

At least not for now is what one hears. Hansie was apparently pretty upset after he was named captain for just two Tests against the visiting Englishmen. He did make a statement that he would coach Glamorgan in the coming season. After consultations with the selectors and following Dr. Ali Bacher's intervention the matter was sorted out. But the last of the matter is not over. There was one selector who wanted Cronje out as captain. Guess who? The man who Cronje succeeded as captain. Kepler Christoffel Wessels. The story goes that Cronje made some snide remarks when he took over from Wessels. And now Wessels wants to extract his pound of flesh.

"It was a tough decision to make for Hansie. Glamorgan offered him 100, 000 pounds to coach it's team," said a member of the South African team. In all probability, he will take that job sooner or later," he added.

When the Karnataka State Cricket Association set up a computer terminal with access to the Internet for the Proteas, they were more than delighted. In fact, they asked for more terminals to be put up. However, they were told that it was a courtesy service from Compaq, KSCA's IT partner, who have an Internet center at the media center. Perhaps the South Africans were keen on having more terminals because ever since they landed in Bombay they have been having problems with their mail. Strydom, for one is an internet freak and he had a tough time setting up his laptop to access the Internet.

There is a haunting fear these days that the unthinkable will happen and Test cricket will die in the one place you thought it's future is safe and secure. That fear stalked us in Bombay; it is happening again in Bangalore.

It is a fear sparked by sparse crowds in the stands, and a silence that will make you feel you're watching a Ranji encounter between Assam and Bihar. And believe me, the proceedings have been so boring that a spectator dozed off and in the process fell off his red plastic chair in the stands during the post-tea session. Organisers have been blaming the ongoing examinations for the sparse attendance but one thinks there is more than just that.

So what is wrong with this Indian team?

'Lions at home,' they were titled. A banner at the Chinnaswamy stadium the other day summed up the sad demise of that title as well. 'Lambs at home,' it read.

And how true.

After a disastrous tour Down Under, the Indian team derived comfort from the thought that they will be playing in their tailor-made backyard and will clean-up the Proteas. That didn’t happen, as the Proteas seemed to be more than just a handful of 'well-oiled machines' as their doctor put it.

During the last fortnight, I spent much time with both the Indian and South African teams. Indeed, I went through several moments of anguish after learning what the Proteas' team management thinks of this Indian team. The team which has the best batsman to have walked the earth since Sir Don Bradman.

To avoid any trouble, I will abstain from using names but just put down some of their quotes.

"It is a shame to see India do this way. This is not a team. It’s just a bunch of individuals who have been made into superstars by the sponsors, the board and the people."

"If these are the three best spinners available in the country, then I think they should start looking within their system for introspection. Where is that guy Joshi, who bowled so well against us in Kenya? He looks god. Also Chauhan, he is a good spinner. Where’s that guy Venkatapathy Raju? Boy, that left-armer was good."

"Sachin is such a poor captain. At one stage we were predicting that he would play into our hands and he did. Every time our batsmen hit the ball somewhere, he would place a fielder there. How many times in an over does he walk over to the bowler and talk to him. There is a limit to it. And who is the bowler, Anil Kumble. God damn! This is your strike bowler; just let him think for himself. What was he going up to him and discussing? The grips, or teaching him how to release the ball for the googly? He took the new ball and what was his field? One slip."

"The ground, at times, looked more like a conference hall. You had Sachin as usual talking to the bowler; Azhar joined in, and Sourav walked into it. Then Kumble came in with Srinath…and lo behold, even Mongia had his bit of advice to give to the bowler. What is this? The NATO annual conference."

"We must bat all day tomorrow as well and grind them into the ground and out of the match. They must be kicking themselves for having scored just 150-odd. All this talk of the wicket being underprepared was utter nonsense. If our night watchman could score 80-odd don’t tell me that they couldn’t get anyone to score that much as well."

"Now that Indian cricket is at its lower most ebb, maybe they should just start looking at things from a more conventional perspective. They should just start afresh."

"When India won the toss, Srinath walked up to Pollock and told him with a huge smile on his face, 'How you guys going to bat last on this wicket?' At tea, last seen, Srinath was ducking away from anything that looked white."

Sure, they were pretty blunt about their players as well.

About Kallis: "He tends to bat himself into a hole at times. Yesterday he just got stuck badly. He should have just played more positively like Darryl did."

About Cullinan: "Darryl proved one thing today. That whatever kind of form you are in, true class shines through. And he is one class act."

About Boje: "Just goes to show how hungry the guys are to perform. One chance and now he has created selectorial problems. He played so straight and looked completely unruffled. He is now has a new name, 'Nicky BOY' "

"We believe that India lost the Test series even before the first ball was bowled. Sachin stepping down before the series started was according to me the biggest setback India could have received. What with all this infighting, how can you can you take us on?"

While in Bangalore, you must be wondering, what happened to that boy who was the answer to India’s search for an all-rounder? Yes, I am talking about Vijay Bhardwaj, the boy who was man of the series in Kenya, who went to Australia with the team, and injured himself while fielding.

Is he ever going to make it back to the Indian team?

No, say the selectors, according to one of the players.

"He had his chances and he blew them away," said one of the selectors.

So while Vijay nurses his disc protrusion, with some yoga and swimming, he can curse his luck. The boy who makes it into the Test team on his performances in the shorter version of the game gets dropped from the Carlton and United Series in Australia based on his performances in Tests.

Didn’t they say, what goes around comes around?