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Mukesh Kumar
Mukesh Kumar. Age 13.
Doda, Jammu & Kashmir

Bharat Award

'I want to fight the militants'

He is unlike other boys his age. He does not speak much. His intense black eyes and brooding face reflect anger, hatred, pain. His occasional half-smiles are sad. He was, you realise, not always like this.

Mukesh Kumar belongs to Leotha, a village in a nook of Doda district of Jammu and Kashmir. He lived there with his father, mother, elder brother and three sisters. He studied in Class 6 at the Government High School near Leotha. He would play cricket and gulli danda with his school friends, watch films on television.

Then an incident on July 19, 1999 changed everything.

Reluctantly, he speaks about the event that changed his life.

"It was around 8 pm and we were having dinner. Me, my parents, my brother and my sisters. All of a sudden, we heard firing outside. My brother and father, who were members of the village defence committee, rushed for their guns. Before they could do anything, the terrorists burst into our house and started firing. They killed my brother, my sisters and my mother.

A bullet hit my father in his arm and he too fell. They left, thinking he was dead. I was hiding behind the grain store. There was blood all over the house. I picked my father's gun, rushed back to the grain store and hiding behind it, shot a terrorist who was going towards another house. I kept firing for a long time.

Then, I moved to my friend Sunil's home next door. His family too had been attacked. Sunil and I kept firing the whole night. Thankfully, our fathers had taught us to handle guns. In the morning, the terrorists stopped firing and ran away.

We feared the terrorists would return to attack us because we had killed two of their men. We left our village and migrated to the tehsil headquarters at Thathree. We live in a rented room, but it is not safe there. People say the militants are still looking for us. No arrangements have been made by the government to protect us from a possible attack. But if something happens, we will fight again.

I knew nothing about this award. In fact, the government officers who came there after the massacre told my father about it. Then he and Sunil's Mamaji filled the form. On November 14, 2000, my father, who heard the news on the radio, told me about it.

Both Sunil and I had got the award. I was happy. All my relatives and friends were happy. But it reminded me of the day when the militants attacked us. It is good, but it does not change much. They say it will help me in my studies and in getting a job. That is good. When I grow up, I want a hathiyaroon wali naukri (a job in the armed forces or police). I want to fight the militants."

As told to Basharat Peer

Next: 'All children should act brave when the need arises': Meet Prince Kumar, winner of the Sanjay Chopra Award for bravery

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