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Rediff.com  » Getahead » Dos and don'ts of dating after break-ups

Dos and don'ts of dating after break-ups

November 09, 2013 11:31 IST

Dos and don'ts of dating after break-ups

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A round of all the sex and relationship news that affects you

Do men fake orgasms during sex?

Can Facebook help you find your first love?

Are men now opting for 'bitchier' girls over nicer ones to date?

To begin with, here are dating dos and don'ts after break-ups...

Dating after a break-up can be hard and extremely uncomfortable for a majority of people, but sooner or later everyone has to face the awkwardness.

The Huffington Post has compiled a list of dos and don’ts that will help you deal with those “first dates” better.

According to the publication, you should take time to primp and pamper before the date and get a sense of whether or not you and your date have the same values and opinions on important issues.

The publication also pointed out that you should not mention your former partner on your first date or pretend to be someone you’re not.

Lastly, flirting is absolutely fine as well as ordering what you crave for without being shy.


Image: A still from Love Breakups Zindagi


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One in four men fake 'I Love You' during sex

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A new study has found that men are more likely to fake an “I love you” during sex.

The study revealed that 25.4 per cent or a quarter of blokes lying about their affections in the heat of the moment, as opposed to just 6.1 per cent of women.

The new survey by The Sunday Telegraph has peeked behind Australian bedroom doors and the results are certainly revealing.

But when it comes to putting on the waterworks, men and women were evenly split at 6.25 per cent of respondents saying they had faked tears during sex.

About the same number of men (8.9 per cent) and women (8.6 per cent) have been pressured into a sexual activity they’ve later regretted.

The survey also found most of those surveyed lost their virginity aged 17, two-in-five or 40.3 per cent have had a one-night stand -- half of which weren’t bothered by it in the morning -- and 30 per cent said it led to a relationship.

Remarkably, more men were willing to reveal their most intimate details, with 78.5 per cent of male respondents completing the survey.

More than half or 52.4 per cent, of respondents said they faked “being in the mood” when responding to their partner’s advances and interestingly it was men begrudgingly going along for the ride.

Almost a third or 32.5 per cent of men admitted they faked “being in the mood” compared to just 19.9 per cent of women. 


Photographs: Uttam Ghosh/Rediff.com

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Yoga improves men's sex life

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Yoga not only improves lung capacity, stronger bones and lower risk of heart disease, but it also helps men have better sex, it has been revealed.

During a Huffington Post Live discussion with men who love yoga, host Caitlyn Becker got the scoop on how the practice benefits them in the bedroom.

Life coach Joseph Robinson pointed out that during great sex, “you want to be in your body, you want to be really present,” and that sensation comes with yoga.

Robinson said that after the first week he had done yoga, he was with his second girlfriend and it was a different experience than the first five years of his sex life.


Photographs: Ilya Naymushin/Reuters

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Couples shy of talking about sexually transmitted diseases in bedrooms

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Having sex can be fun, but talking about sexually transmitted infections with a sexual partner is a totally different matter, according to a new research.

The study from Indiana University’s Center for Sexual Health Promotion, to be discussed during the American Public Health Association’s annual meeting, found a disconnect between the public health messages that promote STD testing as a way to prevent STDs such as HIV and chlamydia and the conversations -- or lack of them -- occurring in bedrooms.

“Talking to partners about STIs is an important conversation to have,” Margo Mullinax, lead researcher for “Talk about testing: What sexual partners discuss in relation to STI status and why,” said.

“However, findings from this study suggest public health campaigns need to promote specific messages, concrete tips and tools around sexual health conversations stratified by relationship status. Campaigns should also address STI stigma and promote messages of normalcy with regard to talking about STIs,” Mullinax said.

STIs, if untreated, can lead to a range of health problems including infertility, so a growing public health emphasis has been on preventing STIs through testing.

Mullinax said little was known, however, about how STI testing figured into actual conversations between lovers, particularly among the college-age crowd that accounts for a disproportionate number of new STI cases nationwide. 




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Wives matter more than hubbies in calming down marital conflicts

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A new study has found that, when it comes to keeping the peace, it’s more important for wives than for their husbands to keep their cool after a heated argument.

The study’s findings revealed while both spouses were equally able to cool down during conflicts, the husbands’ emotional regulation had little or no bearing on long-term marital satisfaction.

Lead author Lian Bloch and fellow researchers at Berkeley and Northwestern University analysed videotaped interactions of more than 80 middle-aged and older heterosexual couples, focusing on how they recovered from disagreements. Time and again they found that marriages where wives quickly calmed down during disputes were shown to be the happiest, both in the short and long run.

Bloch said that emotions like anger and contempt can seem very threatening for couples.

She said that their study suggests that if spouses, especially wives, are able to calm themselves, their marriages can continue to thrive.

Results show that the link between the wives’ ability to control emotions and higher marital satisfaction was most evident when women used “constructive communication” to temper disagreements.

The study has been published online in the journal Emotion.


Photographs: Uttam Ghosh/Rediff.com

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64 per cent people track down their first love via social media

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It seems that we never truly forget our first love, as many of us keep up to date with their lives via social media, a new survey has revealed.

The new survey reveals that 64 per cent people have looked for picture and updates of their childhood sweethearts on Facebook or Twitter to see who they are dating.

More than a quarter of those surveyed have got back in touch with their first love, and one in six people (15 per cent) have slept with their ex, with a further 21 per cent admitting to thinking about having sex with them, after searching them online, The Daily Star reported.

The results have been revealed in a survey of 1,890 people by Lovehoney, which revealed that 45 per cent of women talk about their first love with their current partner, but only 38 per cent of men do the same.

Half of women also said they have been contacted by their ex but have ignored them, whereas this has happened to just 28 per cent of men.

Just over a quarter of them (28 per cent) still reminisce fondly about their first love men (31 per cent) slightly more than women (27 per cent). 


Photographs: Uttam Ghosh/Rediff.com

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New dot-to-dot version of Kama Sutra sex guide launched

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A team of designers have introduced a new dot-to-dot version of the ancient Kama Sutra sex guide, filled with incomplete illustrations of recommended sexual positions.

The sexual illustrations, like the inverted crow and the tortoise, are based on the original Kama Sutra written approximately 1,600 years ago, The Daily Star reported.

The design team said that Kama Sutra was an “obvious subject for a dot-to-dot” as the positions are extremely odd to start with, so when you create a dot-to-dot and take away the main parts of the body, leaving the odd suspended head and hand it looks even more comical.

The team asserted that the response to the first few spreads was utter hilarity, as the fun part is guessing what will be revealed.

They added that making the book was surprisingly difficult as you could easily lose your way round a body when positioning the dots.


Photographs: Uttam Ghosh/Rediff.com

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Men now opting for 'bitchier' girls over nicer ones to date

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Author of the famous ‘Bridget Jones’s Diary’ series, Helen Fielding, has revealed that men now prefer to date sexy and “bitchy” women over nice girls like her heroine.

Fielding explained that while researching for ‘Bridget Jones: Mad About the Boy’, the third installment in the “Jones” series, which is based on today’s social-network-driven dating scene, she posted two fake profiles on an Internet dating site, The New York Post reported.

One profile was of a nice and sweet woman that resembled her book’s lead protagonist and the other was of a woman, dubbed “SuperLuckyBitch” by Fielding, who was glamorous but really horrible.

Fielding said that she was a bit surprised to learn that “SuperLuckyBitch” got all the replies. 


Photographs: Uttam Ghosh/Rediff.com

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