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I love a married man! What do I do?

Last updated on: December 22, 2017 10:50 IST

In a weekly chat with readers, Rediff's Love Guru addressed their relationship problems and offered solutions.

Missed the chat? Here's the transcript!


 


Neeta Sinha

Do you think that physical attributes are more important to maintaining a successful relationship or do you think that friendship maintains a relationship?

Love Guru

Neeta Sinha, there are no hard and fast rules to this, it all comes down to individual choices and tastes. Maybe the ideal is a combination of physical attributes and friendship


Navin Shah

Hi Love Guru..!! How r u? My question is i had a relation with one girl but due to some reason we breakup. And i dont have any love kind of feeling for other girl. Now I am going to marry with the girl. She is beautiful. I am trying to create love kind of environment around her but some inner feeling says dont do it. why he is happening it to me?

Love Guru

Navin Shah, yours seems to be a case of once bitten, twice shy. Shed your inhibitions and inner fear, and go with the flow. Don't think too much, follow your heart, at times it can be right

Seema Dutt

I've been dating a wonderful man for the past 5 weeks. We are so in sync with each other and we are planning to share the rest of our lives together. I am 36, he is 45. I am a widow with no child but he has two. Still i am confused about him. Am i taking right decision? Why I am getting these negative feelings?

Love Guru

Seema Dutt, you are confusing me. You say you are so in sync with each other, yet you say you are confused about him and getting these negative signals. Something doesn't give here. As to whether you are taking the right decision, maybe, maybe not, marriage, especially the second one, can be a bit of a risk. If you are so nervous, why not go for a pre-nup?

Vijay Sharma

I think my wife not satisfied

Love Guru

Vijay Sharma, why do 'think' so? Has she told you so? Has she given indications she is not satisfied with you? Have you tried asking why? If you know why, it is easy to rectify the errors of your ways

Rupa

Sir how to convince my parents to love marriage

Love Guru

Rupa, if they are from the old school that swears by arranged marriage it can be difficult to do so. If you have friends who have had love marriage and who are happy, get them over to meet your parents so they can see for themselves that it is not something terrible

Vaishali

My boyfriend and I have been living together for 4 years and it is a truly great relationship. I would like the commitment of marriage, and he does not. He always gives unrelated reasons for marriage. Why he is ignoring my marriage proposal?

Love Guru

Vaishali, possibly he does not want marriage -- for now, or for ever -- or does not want to marry you. Why don't you ask him this outright? Men, when they don't want to communicate unpleasant things, choose the silent way out, so you will have to get him to talk about this

Vincy

My ex girlfriend married now and we are still close but she has an affair with new boy, this she has expressed me because we are close ... want to know she loves me still

Love Guru

Vincy, great going. If you want to if she loves you still, it will be better to ask her rather than me, don't you think?

Nittin Aggrawal

We both are married to separate partners but presence of each other near us matters us a lot.

We both cant even live a sec without each other.

We luv to share our marital problem to each other.

I had asked her to fulfil her responsibilities to her family as i m doing with mine but cant we both luv each other for our happiness.

Love Guru

Nittin Aggrawal, if only life were so simple. Unfortunately society functions on rules and morals etc, and so long as we live within society we are expected to follow them. So your wish seems impractical

Jenny Dsouza

Do you think it's ok to keep noticing another woman after you are in a committed relationship? Does this change when you are married?

Love Guru

Jenny Dsouza, by noticing you mean simply looking, which everyone does, or gaping/gawking/leching, which should be a strict no-no

Alina

Hi.... I am married.... 32....male...i have a beautiful wife..... but i want one more wife......My wife is ready to accept my second wife......Would the second one will get easily ready for this..... any tips on this love Sandwich

Love Guru

Alina, will the second wife be ready for it? How would I know? You can find out for yourself

Rajiv Ranjan

i need a girl friend. but due to busy schedule I am not able to search it. give me advice

Love Guru

Rajiv Ranjan, you need to decide what is more important for you, your busy schedule from which you cannot take a break, or taking a little time off from it to find a girl friend.

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Advice from the Love Guru does not reflect the opinions of Rediff.com and should not be considered in the capacity of professional counselling.

(Due to circumstances beyond our control, date and time of chat may change)