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Rediff.com  » Getahead » 'I like a girl, but I'm scared to approach her'

'I like a girl, but I'm scared to approach her'

October 10, 2014 12:37 IST

Love GuruWhen relationship problems are too tough for you to figure out, ask the Love Guru for help.

Is your love life down in the dumps?

Has your chosen one left you for someone else?

Or maybe you don't know how to approach the person you fancy?

Don't fret! The all-knowing Love Guru is here!

In an online chat with readers, The Love Guru offered reasonable advice on relationship issues.

For those who missed the chat, here's the unedited transcript:


Swastik Castings Jaipur: I had best GF even after my marriage. we had not any bad relations. My wife once heard me saying 'love you' (normal as we say to our friends), she left me talking and also deactivated her FB account. She respects me a lot, hence she acted like this but, she is little bit disturbed. What to do?

Love Guru: Swastik Castings Jaipur, the more I read your post the more it reminds me of a TV soap. You really think your wife would be fine with you saying 'love you' to another woman on the phone, and you think she acted thus because she respects you? You better come out of your delusion quickly and try making up to your wife, and try not repeating your mistake again

Swastik Castings Jaipur: Thanx a lot Sir. You really opened my eyes. Once again thnx.


valecham@rediffmail.com: A girl if confesses that she has made love due to some unavoidable situation , with two persons , can that girl be trusted

Love Guru: Can a man in a similar situation be trusted? Why should it be different when it comes to a woman, then?


ARVIND AGARWAL: I like a girl but afraid to approach her and tell how I feel about her. What should I do and how should I approach her? I am afraid she would reject my proposal.

Love Guru: Arvind Agarwal, if you don't approach her quickly someone else may and it will be entirely your loss. Get over your inhibitions and approach her, it is not like she is going to have your head for it. The worst that can happen is she may say no to you.


A o: hello sir I am 21 years old and doing M.tech sir I live my cousin house, so wife of cousin, I love her, I proposed her but she said no and said forget me so I want to forget her how ? Give me some idea and I can not leave her house cause some family issue.

Love Guru: A o, I think it will be better for all concerned if you leave your cousin's house asap.


Magnus Fernandes: I have a friend she has a boyfriend but she flirts a lot with me. even i like her what do I do ? some advise

Love Guru: Magnus Fernandes, the flirting you do is it of the innocent kind with her boyfriend's knowledge and in his presence? Or is it serious stuff that the boyfriend is not are of? If the latter, put yourself in his place and ask yourself how you will feel about it.


Mitika-Mavani: I am in a relationship with someone I love since 4.5 years. Everything's up from both the families. We are busy in our respective jobs. I'm very much stressed in my Job and get very irritated with everything which comes on my way. Things get messy between us because of my mood swings. Kindly help me calm down.

Love Guru: Mitika-Mavani, seems to me what you need is a yoga teacher, not a love guru. If you know what the problem is, job-related mood swings, tell me, is it so difficult to find a way to handle it?


deepak sharma: I am about to get married to a girl whom i know since the last 2 years. The problem is that she is too hot headed. She loses her temper within no time. Otherwise she is a wonderful human being but her losing temper is very irritating. is there a solution to this problem. How do I handle her when she looses her temper?

Love Guru: Deepak Sharma, people who lose their cool suddenly also cool down suddenly, and often realise what they've done/said. It's not such a big problem. However, most people also have an off button that makes them cool down quickly, it could be anything. Find out what is your girl friend's and use it wisely


Dipankar Dey: I m in serious love affair over 7 years with this girl. Now her parents are not agreeing because of horoscope between us is not matching. It is impossible to break it now which is unethical also. Please suggest me the way. We are planning for court marriage. Please advice.

Love Guru: Dipankar Dey, blame the stars for the mess. If the opposition over the mismatched horoscope is unrelenting, as I am guessing it would be, and if you two are determined to not let crossed stars come in your way, go ahead with your decision, and all the best for the future. I personally think matching horoscope etc is hogwash, but that's just my belief


WATERMAN Proprietor: I proposed a girl but she could not answer me anything. She just told me that my family will decide that, I can't tell you anything. But she is talking me every day. So please suggest me what to do.

Love Guru: Waterman proprietor, she could be saying the truth. Obviously, while her family's consent is required to consider a proposal, normal friendship is fine. What is so unusual about it?


Lucky-Boy: I am 23 yrs old and I am fall in love with my officemate. Every time I'm just thinking about that. A few days later she have to ask something related to office work so she messaged me but from another number which indicates that she doesn't want to share her mobile no. with me. What should I do next? Should I leave and not think about her or should I try my best?

Love Guru: Lucky-Boy, it's great to be in love with someone, but it's even better if that person were to reciprocate our feelings. From your message I gather she has not. You have two options. One, try to win her over, or forget the whole thing and move on. Your call.


Rahul: I was in relation with a girl for last ten years we, I loved her more than me and I catered her every small things two wheeler, laptop, camera, cellphone, college fees not less than 10 Lakhs I spent, she shifted to some other city and came in to contact with so many ladies most of who had multiple partners. My GF stated she want to marry some one else. Where is my fault here?

Love Guru: Rahul, have you tried meeting her in her new city after she moved? Sometimes distance places a strain on a relationship. Is there any chance of you getting a transfer to her city?


dhanpal: LG- a postgraduate person can marry a SSC pass girl and live happily but can a post graduate girl marry to a SSC pass boy? Has it happened anywhere? What is the percentage?

Love Guru: Dhanpal, if you are facing a relationship issue in your life, please ask me about it. I have no knowledge or expertise to talk about the things you want to talk about


Aprosh Aarsiwala: Met a girl on a dating website that I like, and now she works with me. How do I approach it stating that I would like to go out with her still?

Love Guru: Aprosh Aarsiwala, so you met a girl on a dating site and now you work together and you want to go out with her. I hope she is not your direct report and you don't hold a position of influence over her. Assuming you don't, I'd think the easiest thing would be to ask her straight out, especially considering you met on a dating site


dhanpal: LG- people say in love marriage, same couple fights for divorce. What kind of love was it? why can't that love bind them together instead of separation? if they love each other very much, why they want to separate?

Love Guru: Dhanpal, why do couples fall out of love, why they separate... you should ask the couples that question. It's a free world, anyone can fall in love or out of it, why should it concern you and me?


manish: I like some one , but she likes some one else . It hurts! I cry everyday !She doesn’t even talk to me properly

Love Guru: Manish, you are not the first to face unrequited love, nor will you be the last. So stop behaving like Devdas without the drinking and get a move. So she likes someone else and not you. That's not the end of the world!


lmjoshi: Sir I am widower I want to marry but not accept me any girl. Pls kuch batao sir.

Love Guru: Imjoshi, all I can say is keep trying. Being a widower is not the end of the road, remarriage is likely to happen. Have you tried placing advertisements in the matrimonial sites and columns of newspapers?


Deepalikumari: We all possess beauty and believe it or not, we all also possess ugly. The person with whom you choose to spend the rest of your life should magnify your strengths and balance out your weaknesses. He should make you feel like not only the best version of yourself, but the truest version, as well. If you had to summarise yourself in just 5 qualities, what would be?

Love Guru: Deepalikumari, thanks for your questions, but as I said before, no questions about me. If you have a relationship issue, shoot


Vinu Murthy: Do our core values and beliefs repel or compel each other?

Love Guru: Vinu Murthy, speaking from a relationship perspective, core values shouldn't be of the repelling type, as they are what defines who one is


Jyotsanarane: What is the one thing that would be a relationship breaker?

Love Guru: Jyotsanarane, there is no universal relationship breaker, would differ from person to person. For most, though, I guess infidelity would be a deal-breaker.


Shankar Kathurde: Who do you believe is the dominant one in a relationship and why?

Love Guru: Shankar Kathurde, are relationships about dominance?


Illustration: Uttam Ghosh/Rediff.com

Also read 

Advice from the Love Guru does not reflect the opinions of rediff.com and should not be considered in the capacity of professional counselling.

If you have a question, you can post it right here! And be sure to log in every Thursday, between 3 and 4 pm IST!

(Due to circumstances beyond our control, date and time of chat may change)

Tags: IST