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Dad tips: 'Plan a gap of 3 years before your 2nd child'

November 27, 2020 13:39 IST

We'd asked you, dear readers, to tell us how you prepared yourself to become a father and share tips for dad-to-be Virat Kohli.
Pranesh Kumar from Coimbatore shares his parenting experience:

Pranesh Kumar and son Srinath

IMAGE: Pranesh Kumar and son Srinath. Photograph: Kind courtesy Pranesh Kumar

After I got married in 2005, we waited 3 years to become parents.

I wanted to secure my child's future so I started investing in mutual funds before he was born.

When I saw Srinath for the first time, I was emotional and happy. It's hard to describe the feeling of joy and excitement when I held him in my arms.

Unfortunately, I had just started my business that year. So I couldn't be there with my wife and son most of the time.

In 2008, everyone was struggling with recession. I couldn't afford to take paternity leave. Instead I had to work harder for my family.

I still blame myself for not planning well and being unavailable due to work commitments.

Two years later, we became parents again to a baby girl.

Since our son was still young, we struggled a bit to manage both children. We enrolled our son in a play school nearby to manage our time better.

My advice is: There should be at least a gap of 3 to 4 years before you plan your second child.

This will help you focus on both children well.

The eldest one will be slightly more independent, understand things better and this will help him/her bond with the sibling.

Being parents to two kids has been a good learning experience for both of us.

What works for you may not work for someone else. So it's best to take each day as it comes, give your children all your love and care while you can.


Dads, tell us what those few days before your child was born was like?

What were the special things you did for your wife?

How did you get ready for the newest member of your family?

Do share your stories about the birth of your children.

Did you go on paternity leave?

What were your most memorable moments? And your most difficult?

What are the sacrifices you have made?

What is the one fatherhood lesson you have learnt that you would like to share?

Do you have tips for Virat Kohli? Share your experience with us.

Write in to getahead@rediff.co.in (Subject: Dad tips). Do mention your name, age, the place where you live and the year your child was born.

Please do share pictures of you with your baby.

And, till we beat the Coronavirus, stay safe. Wash your hands. Wear your mask. Maintain social distancing.

PRANESH KUMAR