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Did you take our sex quiz? Here are the results!
Kanchana Banerjee
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November 27, 2007
Some days ago, we published a quiz, asking couples if their lives have become too busy to have sex. 15,468 Get Ahead readers took the quiz and here are the results:

9,686 readers (63 percent of those who participated), scored more than 70 points on the quiz, indicating that they have a perfectly satisfactory, rewarding sex life.

5,163 readers (33 percent), scored between 40 and 70 points, indicating that sex takes place only when it's a matter of convenience.

619 readers (4 percent), scored less than 40 points, indicating that their lives are so hectic, they have virtually no time at all for sex.

The verdict? From the looks of it, the majority of young Indian couples are still pretty frisky in the bedroom, regardless of hectic lifestyles and work commitments. As per the quiz, however, 37 percent -- and that's a sizeable figure -- have either very little or no time at all for sex.

Sunita Dhawan*, 29, a Mumbai-based HR consultant says, "My day starts early -- I prepare both breakfast and lunch, then pack tiffins for my hubby and myself and we're off to work. After a long day at the office, I'm back home in the kitchen, cooking dinner. By the time I've finished cleaning up, I just want to crash. Who has the energy for sex?"

Subodh Das*, 31, an executive who works at a Gurgaon-based BPO, has a similar story to tell. "I have very long and erratic work hours," he says. "My wife is a chartered accountant with a leading five star hotel. We both have very demanding and stressful jobs. I can't remember when we had sex last. We love each other deeply, but sex -- who has the time and the energy for it?"

Welcome to the lives of many of India's young working couples. They rock it up at the office, but when it comes to sex with their spouses, they are just too pooped to make the effort. If DINKS -- 'Double Income, No Kids' -- was the mantra of the last decade, some couples may be moving in the direction of DINS -- 'Double Income, No Sex'!

The truth of the matter is that stressful jobs, difficult deadlines and impossible targets can take a toll not only on the general health of young couples, but also keep them from getting intimate even though they sleep in the same bed every night.

It's difficult to think about sex after 12 to 14 hours of gruelling work, followed by a long commute home. This leads to extreme mental exertion and consequently, to a total disinterest in sex. In the hectic lives of many dual-income couples, job satisfaction is more of a priority than intimacy and sexual satisfaction.

DINS couples are ambitious and obsessed with making it big. Shekhar* and Anita Singh*, both aged 30, recently bought their dream home in Delhi. Says Anita, "The loan amount is huge and hangs like a sword above our heads. We have no financial backing and can think of nothing else till we pay it off. We both work and when we are together, all we talk about is how to make our money sweat and pay off the loan faster. There's just no time for sex in our lives. We are too busy working, earning more money to make a better life."

Many times, it also happens that one partner craves sexual intimacy, while the other is too steeped in work to pay attention. Deepa S*, 30, works with a hotel in Hyderabad. Her husband Aman* is a dentist. He often complains that Deepa has lost the urge to get intimate. "She is always so wound up about her work! We rarely have sex," he complains.

Deepa, on the other hand says, "Aman doesn't understand the pressures of my job. I have to be on call 24x7 or someone else will replace me. I'm so tired at the end of the day that sex is the last thing on my mind."

So how do the majority of couples cope? It's not too difficult -- all it needs is some out-of-the-box thinking! Here are a few tips from couples who manage to keep up the action between the sheets regardless of fast-paced lifestyles and work pressure!

Phone fun

Make good use of technology to connect with your partner. Naughty phone calls and SMSes are instant boosters. Phone calls don't have to be long-drawn out; short and quick is the rule of the game. Sabita Shukla*, 27, a freelancer writer from Delhi says, "My husband's career requires him to travel a lot, so we indulge in serious phone sex. Sometime a naughty SMS in the morning or five-minute tele-chat works well for both of us."

Her husband Amol* couldn't agree more -- "I love waking up to Sabita's SMSes. Being a writer, she sends very creative messages and even if I'm in the middle of something very important, they perk me up."

You can also use instant messaging services or chat online. Making the best of a situation is the key here; regardless of time constraints, you can do a lot to connect with your partner. Naughty calls and messages often serve as a precursor to what awaits later. Adds Amol, "After a good round of phone sex, I'm always eager to get home and be with my wife."

Beat the stress

Don't let stress get to you and your partner. You don't need a counsellor to tell you that you need to make a conscious effort in the sack and that sex itself is a great way to beat stress! Sushma Arora*, 32, an executive at a foreign bank in Delhi, says, "My husband and me have made a pact. When one of us is stressed out, the other administers a relaxing body massage and that usually leads to sex. And it's a fact that sex makes you feel better, drives away stress and helps you sleep well."

Most couples will agree with Sushma -- great sex is usually a great precursor to restful sleep, so forget counting sheep and have a romp in the sack instead!

Drop your inhibitions and get naughty!

Annie Ray*, 30, a Hyderabad-based graphic designer, says, "My investment banker husband is always so stressed because of work issues that I find it difficult to calm him. So for one of his office dos, I wore a stunning sari sans any innerwear! At the party, while he was in the middle of a serious discussion with his colleagues, I just SMSed him that I was going commando -- the look on his face was worth a million bucks! Needless to say, we came home early and it was a night to remember."

If this sounds crazy and is something you could never imagine doing, stop and think back to the last time you did something uninhibited -- it's never too late to make a start!

Instead of complaining about the darkness, light a lamp. It's up to you to bring the spark back into your relationship and your life!

*Names have been changed to protect privacy.

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